Be a Burden Bearer

When I was 33-years old, I slipped on an icy sidewalk and fractured my knee cap. Ouch! I never dreamed how much something that looked like a simple "skinned knee" could impact my life. In an instant, I had been sidelined. It was as if God had grabbed me and said, "You, Deb. Time out. You're benched until further notice." I had an inkling that I'd been hiding

from my emotional pain. The reality that my husband Randy was an alcoholic lurked in my thoughts. But if I stayed busy enough, I could  avoid the truth that was too painful to confront.

I spent weeks on the couch, my leg in a huge plaster cast from my ankle to my thigh. I couldn't run away--even if I wanted to. Instead, I had a front row seat to observe what was happening in my marriage--and it wasn't pretty.

A friend had told me about a Christian counseling practice in Seattle called Burden Bearers. She encouraged me to call and make an appointment. I remember the day my friend loaded me and my crutches into the backseat of her Ford Pinto, my bulky cast propped on the console. She drove me to my first counseling appointment at Burden Bearers--an important step on my journey toward healing.

A burden bearer was exactly what I needed--and what Jesus commands us to be for others, like my friend was for me.

     Galatians 6:2 tells us:  Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 

It's true that sometimes we feel too weak and overwhelmed to carry another person's burdens. That's when God sends people to help us. Since my knee injury, I've had many opportunities to help someone else who's carrying a heavy load. It's usually in an area where I've also walked and learned and grown--and experienced God's faithfulness and mercy.

I love the story from the book of Mark, about the paralytic man who is carried to Jesus on a mat by his four friends. They're convinced Jesus can help him. When they can't get close enough to Jesus because of the crowds, they take matters into their own hands.They climb up on the roof and make an opening so they can lower their paralyzed friend down --right in front of Jesus. That took some boldness. I probably would've said, I guess we aren't going to see Jesus today...and resigned myself to that. But these friends were determined. They were desperate to help their friend. We will get him to Jesus--no matter what! These friends are burden bearers in every sense of the word.

So what does it mean to come alongside someone in a time of need? How can you be a burden bearer?

•  Be Available

          You don't need all the answers or a degree in counseling. You need to be willing to listen and offer support. Let your friend know she isn't walking this road alone. Sometimes your quiet presence means everything.    

•  Be Bold

           Be a "roof ripper," as a friend of mine described the actions of the paralytic man's friends.  Step out of your comfort zone. Send the note or email. Even better, make the phone call. Offer to be a burden bearer.  

• Be Compassionate

It's easy to get caught up in our daily routines and not be aware of others who are hurting. Bob Pierce, the founder of World Vision, said:

                    Let my heart be broken by the things that break the heart of God. 
         
         And then help me do something about it. Take action. Get beyond my own self-centered  thinking. Lord, help us be connected with others so we'll know when there's a need.   

Our world is filled with hurt and pain. You don't have to look far to find opportunities to reach out to others who are struggling. I can hardly imagine where I'd be today if I hadn't had friends who came to carry me through some tough times. I am so grateful for the opportunity to pass this comfort on to others.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. 2 Corinthians 1: 3-4 

Who is in your life who needs a burden bearer?

                                                                                      

 

After the Firestorm: Finding Out What Matters Most

The view from our house on July 17, 2014

I've never been so happy to turn a calendar page as I was at the end of August. I flipped the page from August to September, breathing a guarded sigh of relief. Our world has been rocked by the firestorm that blew up on July 17. During the summer and early fall, wildfires are part of life here in hot, dry north central Washington. We've seen the mushroom-cloud smoke plumes that tower skyward. We've witnessed hillsides burning in the distance. The Thirtymile Fire in 2001 seemed relatively insignificant until it raged out-of-control, killing four young firefighters. I remember the somber gathering held at our local high school gym where we paid our respects. This heartbreaking tragedy  caused the forest service to re-evaluate firefighting protocols.

But this year, the Carlton Complex Fire became the largest fire in Washington state history, burning more than 250,000 acres. Long-time residents say they've never seen anything like it. Unlike other fires, this one destroyed homes--more than 300 at last count. These are friends and neighbors who have lost everything. I can't imagine where you begin to start over. The fire, ignited by a lightning strike near Carlton, traveled more than 25 miles in less than 8 hours to burn hundreds of homes near Pateros. People barely had time to evacuate. It's nothing short of a miracle that no lives were lost that night and in the following days and weeks.

We were without power and water for 10 days in the area where I live. Others "camped" without electricity for almost 3 weeks. Everyone has been affected by the stress of living on high alert--not knowing if and when you'll have to evacuate or if a new fire will be ignited by lightning or something as random as a tire rim from a flat tire creating sparks. And if the fires weren't bad enough, mudslides caused by heavy rain and flash flooding several weeks later, washed out roads and destroyed more homes. It's hard to wrap my mind around the devastation.

Yet in the midst of  disaster, you can't help but notice the bright spots. I think of the hardworking heroes who have given so much to our communities...the firefighters who relentlessly dug fire lines in 100 degree weather, the local PUD joined by other utility companies who worked 16-hour days to get the power on, Red Cross volunteers who came to lend a hand or a shoulder to cry on. Community centers and schools were transformed into shelters staffed by volunteers. Almost immediately, donations of supplies poured in. A statement said they couldn't accept any more donations. There simply wasn't room.

A benefit, "Blues for the Burn," was sponsored by the organizers of the popular summer Rhythm & Blues Festival. More than 400 people enjoyed an evening of music and dancing. Many came from out-of-town, wanting to support the beautiful Methow Valley and those who have lost so much. All proceeds went to our local food bank/charitable organization, "The Cove," who will distribute the funds. I'm amazed and moved by the generosity of our community.

In September, I had the privilege of helping at a fire relief clothing event sponsored by The Heart of CAbi Foundation and Independent CAbi Consultants. More than 90 women who had lost all their personal clothing in the fires or mudslides came to "shop" for brand new designer clothing--except they didn't need any shopping dollars. CAbi, a clothing company, donated 1,000 items of clothing. Each woman who attended went home with at least 10 free new outfits. I stood by to offer coffee, muffins, scones, and sandwiches--but most important, I listened to their stories of loss, gave hugs, and even helped dry some tears. 

It seems like disasters, whether natural events, or tragedies like 9/11, tend to draw people together. Suddenly we're shoulder-to-shoulder, ready to help and encourage others wherever we can. Even though I pray we never have another summer like this one, I'm grateful for the overwhelming support we've received--and for this reminder:

The things that matter the most in this world, they can never be held in our hand. –Gloria Gaither
  
I've had a first-hand glimpse of this through those in our community who are bravely moving forward after losing so much.
       
      

What I've Learned through a Lifetime of Marriage

My husband Randy and I recently celebrated 44 years of marriage.

Our anniversary celebration at Steak 'N Shake

Wow--how can that be possible when we're only 30+ years old? Well... we haven't been that age for a long time, but it's still hard to imagine we've spent most of a lifetime together.

When we first got married, I had this naive notion that all we needed was love. Da...da...da...da... da....All you need is love...All together now...When I hear those words, I automatically want to burst into song. Never mind about the misunderstandings and the immaturity of two 19 year-olds who are going to become parents before their first anniversary. As long as we have love, we will stay together. Wasn't that also a song? Love will keep us together. If only it were that simple.

We do need love, but not the kind Hollywood portrays or most of us envision. I remember seeing the movie Love Story with Randy when we were dating. Ryan O'Neal and Ali MacGraw (can you believe she's 75?) looked deeply into each other's eyes and proclaimed, Love means never having to say you're sorry.

How sweet (and unrealistic) is that? But that's the love I was looking for...where romantic feelings never fade and you sail off together as best friends and lovers without a disagreement or ever raising your voice or crying yourself to sleep.

After 44 years and weathering many marital ups and downs, I've learned a lot about real-life relationships:

• There's no such thing as 50/50 in marriage. Many times you'll be the one giving more than you bargained for. It would be nice if everything were split neatly in half. The reality is that each of you will be called on at different times to give more than your share. It's also good not to keep score.   

• Recognize the myth of the greener grass. It's possible there is "greener grass," but many of us see the grass and want to vault over the fence without considering the costs. The repercussions of an affair are devastating for everyone. Two families are directly affected, as well as extended family and friends. Life is never the same after trust in a marriage has been broken. God can heal and bring reconciliation, but the price paid is excruciatingly high.

• Love the one you're with. What would happen if you intentionally treated your spouse as if you really loved him/her? Not the Love Story type of love, but love that's patient, kind, steadfast in sickness and in health, in good times and bad times. God's kind of love that never fails.  

Randy and I have been blessed to experience this love in our marriage. It didn't come naturally, though. It took a lot of pain and struggle and heartache. We both realized the ability to love well was only possible if we were willing to get beyond our selfishness. As we experienced God's grace, we were then able to begin to love each other unconditionally. Not perfectly, but in a way that says I want the best for you. I'm willing to do whatever I can to encourage you, to build you up, to help you become the person God created you to be.

And guess what? I found out I married the right guy-- the one who has been God's gift to me for almost a lifetime. And yes, we've learned that saying you're sorry is at the top of the list!

If you're struggling to love your spouse, there is hope! Small acts of kindness can be a good starting place. I would love to pray with you and encourage you to believe that God's love never fails. 

 

        








  

Reach Out!

The half hour drive from Meridian, Idaho to Boise seemed like the longest of my life. Late one night, I packed our 10 and 7-year old sons in the car with me to escape the turmoil at home. My husband Randy had been drinking again. I suspected that he was an alcoholic. If I admitted that, then I'd be faced with reality--with the elephant that stalked our house. I felt at a total loss in knowing what to do.

A few nights before, I had accused Randy of being an alcoholic. It was as if I'd thrown gasoline on a simmering fire. He exploded in anger and shoved me against the kitchen wall. I wanted to run away and never come back. But two little boys slept upstairs. I'm sure they weren't really sleeping-- probably terrified of what was happening between their parents. Even after 30 + years, I still remember how desperate I felt.

I made the brave decision to take Chris and Jeremy with me to a women's shelter at the YWCA in Boise. A kind woman greeted us at the door when we arrived. She showed us to a neat room with three roll-away beds. She assured us we would be safe. I hugged and kissed my sons and tried my best to reassure them. I'm not sure I slept much that night, but I felt some relief. We stayed there for a few days. After having several counseling sessions and discussions with Randy, I decided to go home.

Even though it would be a long time before our home was a peaceful place, I had learned some important truths. I was no longer alone. I had been directed to Al-Anon, a support group for families and friends of alcoholics. There I would find tools and resources to help me deal with our problems. The journey toward my own healing and wholeness had begun. I will always be grateful for the YWCA in Boise and their caring staff who took us in that night. I also learned that no matter how bleak a situation appears, there is always hope for change.

How often I've thought about the need we as women have for a time-out when circumstances get crazy. Maybe you're not dealing with alcoholism and a spouse who is physically or verbally abusive. But you're tired, weary. You need a place to just be quiet and hear yourself think. A place where you feel loved and can be reassured that you are going to be all right.  

Remember, you are not alone. Help is only a phone call or internet click away. The YWCA was only my first step of support. I could write pages to list all the friends, counselors, and support groups who have been part of my recovery journey.

Today, I can hardly believe I'm the same woman who made that impossibly long drive to reach out for help. I can hardly believe Randy is the same man who desperately needed to check out of reality by drinking. Today we enjoy the gift and miracle of sobriety in our lives and peace that comes from knowing we are in the center of God's will.

When you are called out of crippling fear...you will be amazed at what God has planned for you. There is a world of breathtaking wonder wrapped up in trusting God with everything you have and everything you are. You will discover that you are free! -Sheila Walsh

Let me know if you need to reach out for help. I'd love to help you take a step on your journey to freedom!
  

My Way or the High Way

I used to think it was all Randy’s fault. If only he’d stop drinking, then we (or most importantly) I could be happy. I also thought I could change him. I could make him want to stay sober. I used ultimatums (you’d better stop drinking or…I’ll leave you…I’ll file for divorce, etc.) I thought he would be motivated to stop drinking. Wrong!

I launched my personal mission to get Randy sober. I placed inspirational books in strategic places around the house and refrigerator magnets with Bible verses on the fridge. When Randy popped open a can of beer, he would see those verses and want to change. Suddenly he would see the light, drop to his knees in gratitude, and proclaim his desire to stay sober. Wrong—again!

It is so tough to love your husband well in circumstances like this, finding the right balance in loving him that reflects Christ’s character. Maybe you’re dealing with a situation where you’ve tried everything you know to love your husband. Nothing ever changes and you feel angry and frustrated. You’ve lost all hope.

I know how you feel. For the longest time it was all about me. I don’t deserve this. Why am I going through this? It isn’t fair. Author and Women of Faith speaker, Patsy Clairmont once said, “Fair is where you buy cotton candy!”

I needed that reminder. The truth is, life isn’t fair. It’s how we respond to life’s inequities that determines whether or not we will find contentment. Looking back, I can see how my reluctant choices to take the “higher road” in our relationship, helped our marriage survive.

Maybe what we need is a road map to guide us, some cues to encourage us to let go of “our way” and become willing to choose God’s “high way.” I thought of the acronym H.I.M. I had to intentionally follow Him (Jesus) to become more Christ-like in all of my relationships.

H = Humility 

Jesus is humility personified. He had a way of zeroing in on a problem and speaking the truth in love. He had a posture of gentle strength. Humility doesn’t mean accepting or condoning your spouse’s bad behavior, but it does mean treating him the way Jesus treated others.

Dangerous Detours that almost derailed me:

1. Self-pity—Why me? This isn’t fair!
 2. Blaming—It’s not my fault.
3. Comparing—The grass is greener myth.

I shifted my thinking. I learned to admit where I had been wrong. Who me? I learned to accept responsibility for my actions.

 Humble yourself in the presence of the Lord and He will exalt you. James 4:10

 I= Integrity

Integrity is courageous honesty, speaking truth in a compassionate way to ourselves and others. Jesus was also a master of integrity.  

Dangerous Detours where I often got hung up:

1. Denial—Refusing to believe or accept what is true.
2. Fear of confrontation—Lack of boundaries or inability to set limits.
3. Disrespect—Treating your spouse in a discourteous manner.

 I needed to honestly confront Randy (and myself) with reality. Truth gives us the ability to walk into the light instead of staying forever hidden in the darkness. Truth brings freedom and relief.

 You will know the truth and the truth will set you free. John 8:32

M= Maturity

Maturity helps us extend grace to others and give up the need to be right. Maturity requires that we're grounded in reality and that we do our best to make wise choices.

Jesus knew how to reach people. He asked probing questions and told stories to make his point.  

Dangerous Detours that kept me stuck: 

1. Unforgiveness—Bitterness and resentment, the desire to punish the person who has wronged you. 2. Selfishness—Insisting on your own agenda.
3. A hardened heart—Stubborness and unwillingness to change or accept instruction.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29

I almost gave up on Randy and our marriage. I’m so thankful the Lord gave me friends who pointed me toward a “higher way.”

• Toward humility so my heart would become tender instead of critical.
• Toward integrity so I could confront the lies I’d told myself and have courage to confront my husband in love.
• Toward maturity so I could act unselfishly, desiring to awaken the goodness in my husband.

By attempting to follow Him, I have truly experienced God’s grace.

Grace is undeserved generosity. It’s a hug when I deserve a slap. And that spirit of forgiving is the soil from which grow words that impart grace to those who hear. Only tender hearts produce words that heal rather than hurt. –Jerry Harvill

Where are you on your journey to follow H.I.M.?

Change can be Good

We've come to the end of another Thanksgiving weekend--the first Thanksgiving in many years that we've stayed home for the holiday. Usually we travel over the mountains, through the woods, and on the ferry to my parents' home on Washington's Olympic Peninsula.

This year, Mom wasn't feeling up to having company. Understandable. She's still recovering from a mastectomy in August on top of the ongoing demands of caring for my dad who has dementia. I left the decision about Thanksgiving to Mom. We didn't want to add an iota to her already overloaded plate of responsibilities...even though I would've loved to cook up all the traditional Thanksgiving fixings for her and Dad.

One night after I talked with Mom, I woke up with that unsettled feeling that I've experienced more frequently. I recognize what it is--anxiety about my parents and how I can support them. Almost immediately, a phrase popped into my sleep-clouded thoughts: Change can be good. I remembered Patsy Clairmont at Women of Faith speaking about change and the positive outcomes it can bring. 
 
Sometimes we get tunnel vision and we only see the bleakness of a situation. Dad and Mom alone on Thanksgiving...would Mom even want to cook? What if they had to resort to frozen dinners? That's when I realized I don't always consider the God- factor...how might He use this for good? How will the situation change when He shows up? What if the change I've been dreading or feeling sad about is the change that is most needed?

It all comes back to trusting God...no matter what is happening around me. I must believe He will always be there. He knows all the ins and outs of every circumstance. My abilities and resources are limited. His are boundless.

When I called Mom on Thanksgiving, I asked her if she was cooking.  No...she didn't have to do any cooking. Her neighbors were bringing Thanksgiving dinner. "They insisted," Mom added.

Wow! The Lord had taken care of Dad and Mom without me making any arrangements. Changing our Thanksgiving plans had given Mom a much-needed rest--and the ability to be blessed by her neighbors. I breathed a sigh of relief and made a mental note to remember--yes, change can be good!

Is there some change in your life you're dreading? How does considering the God-factor help you face uncertainty? 

Coming Home

Last weekend I came home once again. I attended the Northwest Christian Writers Association Writers Renewal in Seattle. I love working the registration desk because I get to throw my arms around old friends and give an enthusiastic welcome to newcomers--imagining the bright, new world opening up to them.

It's still a mystery how the conference brochure showed up in my mailbox inviting me to my first writers conference--the one that our Writers Renewal has evolved from. It was summer, 1986. My life felt like a major detour. I had been "sentenced" to the couch with a knee injury. Two surgeries later, I was still trying to manage the chronic pain. The invitation to Seattle Pacific University's writers conference grabbed me by surprise and got me thinking beyond a patella (knee cap) that didn't track properly.

When I hobbled onto the campus with cane in hand, I wondered why I had thought this was a good idea. I felt like a 13-year old on my first day of junior high--scared spitless! But something happened during those two days. Even though it was my first experience with writers, I felt familiar...like this was where I belonged. I sensed a new journey had begun...one of stringing words together, being honest and true about my own life experiences; the joys, sorrows, and disappointments. I came away committed to write about the hope we have in Jesus Christ...no matter what's going on around us. Since then, I've had the incredible privilege of sharing this hope far beyond what I could have imagined.

On my drive home from this year's conference, gratitude welled up inside me. How amazing it is to have the support and encouragement from a community of writers/friends who share the journey with me. People who have not only extended their hands to help me, but also their hearts. We are in this together--not fierce competitors who clutch our creativity for fear someone else might steal it. Editors, agents, and workshop leaders reiterate the message: we are here to help you succeed. And they mean it.

The next time you feel frustrated because of some unplanned life-detour, don't despair. This might be the catalyst pointing you in the direction where God is calling, where He can use you and your strengths for His greatest purpose. Without that annoying, difficult time-out in my life, I might not have found my way home.

Practicing Priorities

I recently watched the movie, Flash of Genius.

It's a touching story based on Dr. Robert Kearns' invention of the intermittent windshield wiper. Wow! I had no idea how this technology came into being. Now my sense of gratitude for wipers that swipe over my windshield intermittently won't ever be the same thanks to Dr. Kearns. The movie tells how Kearns challenged the Ford Motor Company in an eleven year legal battle to prove he was the sole inventor of this windshield wiper technology, not Ford, as they claimed to be.

This is a David v. Goliath story, which has you rooting the whole way for Dr. Kearns, even though another part of his story is quite tragic. He eventually wins his case against this massive company and is awarded a fortune. As I watched events unfold, I couldn't help but think about the value of family relationships and time spent with the ones we love. How can we put a price on those? Even winning millions doesn't make up for the time Kearns missed out on with his wife and six children. His family grew up while he was obsessed with his lawsuit against Ford. 

When Kearns finally wins his long overdue recognition and the settlement from Ford, he turns to his by then ex-wife and proclaims, "We won!" She smiles politely, congratulates him with a hug, and then walks away.

I understand his desire to be recognized for his accomplishments, and I'm not convinced I would have done any better under similar circumstances. But it raises the question about priorities for me. Undoubtedly, I'm not in a contest for a multi-million dollar settlement, but I still want to use each day wisely, not getting caught up with activities and pursuits that in the big picture, don't matter much.

I look back on earlier years when I'd spend evenings on the phone complaining to friends about my marital problems instead of being present for my husband and our sons, or being crazy-busy with activities (all good causes, of course!) instead of slowing down to appreciate the simple pleasures of each day. I know I missed out on many opportunities to be there for my family, my number one priority after my relationship with God.

How about you? Are you chasing after pursuits that burn up time, but don't matter much? Keeping my priorities in order is a constant challenge. May the Lord give us wisdom to choose wisely.

Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me--watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly. Matthew 11:28 (The Message) 

Love Never Fails!

I have a sign my friend Jenni painted for me that hangs in our living room. The message is simple, yet profoundly difficult: Love never fails, words from 1 Corinthians 13, the well-known love chapter in the Bible.

I'm more keenly aware of the meaning as Randy and I celebrate our 40th wedding anniversary next Sunday! How this is even possible is such a miracle of God's grace, one we certainly didn't do anything to deserve.

Forty years ago, we started out with stars in our eyes and as much love as we could hold in our hearts at age nineteen. Nineteen--looking back through the lens of being older and wiser, I wonder how anyone could be mature enough at that age to take on the responsibilities of being husband and wife. When we stood at the altar in front of a church filled with friends and family on that steamy July afternoon, we had no idea of what real love is all about. We expected everything to be rosy, but what about the challenges of living with adversity and disappointment? We didn't have a clue. 

Our love was framed by contemporary culture and a flimsy notion made popular by a1970s novel-turned-movie: Love means never having to say you're sorry. We quickly learned we had to say sorry a lot.


Our love certainly failed many times. Over and over, more times than I can count. When a marriage becomes difficult, it's much easier to look at your partner and see everything that's wrong. I did. If only he...became my focus, and I launched a campaign to change him, instead of looking at myself. What is it I need to change? Lord, help me look at my heart, I began to pray. I found this to be an incredibly difficult and painful process, but necessary if I was to learn how to love someone with God's kind of love, love that never fails.


When I think of the never-failing capacity of love, it's clear that only God's love never fails. His love in and through us gives us courage to hang in there when we think there's no hope, to believe beyond any doubt that God is at work in our lives. And that makes all the difference. I used to think nothing would ever change in my marriage, that I'd feel short-changed and resentful because I was married to a man who couldn't love himself, much less someone else.

That's when the never-failing part of God's love shows up. Just when you think you've got the situation figured out, Jesus Christ, God incarnate, comes on the scene and changes everything--especially people's hearts, and then, nothing is ever the same. Even if only one person in a marriage allows the Lord to change her heart,and becomes the one who extends God's never-failing love to her spouse, the dynamics in their relationship will be different. That's a guarantee!

If you're wondering how you'll last for the next months or even weeks in your marriage, if you think there's no hope for a decades-long anniversary celebration some day, think again...of a love that never fails, a love that transforms hearts and lives. It happens--joyfully, surprisingly, miraculously!

God Can Do Anything!

The call came on an October afternoon about three years ago, an unfamiliar voice on my voice mail.

"Hi, my name is Julie and I'm from Missouri. I read your book, Because I Said Forever, and I wanted to say thank you. You've really helped me in my marriage, and I just wanted to let you know."

I was so touched by her call. It had been a discouraging day. I had recently resigned at my day-job, thinking I was going to another position, one I knew I'd love, but I had just gotten the word. They weren't ready for me--and didn't know when I'd be able to start.

"Gee, I don't know what to tell you, Deb." My prospective employer sounded nonchalant. Now I was officially unemployed, and in a small community like ours, employment opportunities are slim--especially on the verge of winter, the slow season in our tourist-oriented town.

Then I listened to my voice mail, and there was Julie's message. That someone had taken time to find me and make that phone call made me want to cry. It was as if the Lord were saying, "I know exactly where you are today and how you're feeling."

As writers, we pour our hearts and souls out onto the computer screen, never dreaming that God can do anything--far more than we could ever imagine in our wildest dreams. In the solitude of our writing spaces, it's hard to fathom that God can cause our words to travel across the country or around the world. But every now and then, He pulls the veil aside and allows us to see. And that is a holy privilege!

Of course, I had to track Julie down. Thank the Lord that she told me her last name and it wasn't "Smith" or "Jones!" After some trial and error (how many different ways could you spell her last name?) I called Julie to let her know how much she had encouraged me. I was delighted to find a new friend in Missouri, someone I felt I had always known, a true sister in the Lord. Julie and I corresponded by phone and email over the next months that stretched into years.

"Deb, I would love to have you come to Missouri someday," Julie would say. I agreed that this would be an incredible blessing, but I wasn't sure how we could pull this off coming all the way from Seattle.

When I learned that our nephew planned to be married in Missouri  in August, the wheels started turning. Maybe we could combine our trip for the wedding with an opportunity to meet Julie and her family.

Only three weeks ago, Randy and I traveled to Missouri, the first time either of us had ever set foot in the Show-Me state. When Julie introduced us at the church where Randy and I had the privilege of speaking, she told the story of that October afternoon three years ago. "This is a miracle," Julie said.

I smiled through tears, remembering how the Lord had turned an ordinary afternoon into something extraordinary--how He had encouraged me to keep writing. Don't give up, He seemed to be saying. You have no idea where I will send your words. And I chuckled to myself remembering how long I was unemployed-- maybe two weeks-- before God provided an even better job. O you of little faith... 

The title of my message that night in Kirksville, Missouri was God can do Anything! Words I need to remember whether I'm facing unemployment or a file of rejection letters.

Julie and Deb, August 2009